After the first two debacles with online dating, I decided to go on an OKC break. Keep it running, but not pursue anything. Then, of course, the universe threw me a curveball. A very cute (cute, in like a dude way, not a "OMG he's so beautiful he will melt my eyeballs if I look at him" way), very successful (if he was honest about his income) man emailed me. Sent me something hilarious, and we all know I'm a sucker for someone who can make me laugh. We emailed back and forth, and I was already getting excited when I would see that I had a response from him. We talked before I left for a work trip in NYC. Great conversation, a lot of joking and laughing. I left for New York, then he left for Montana, so we made plans to meet almost a week and a half after we talked (side note: this was a BIG mistake, hope to never repeat it). We spent the entire time texting each other. It was ridiculous, I was like a little schoolgirl, giggling over his messages, showing my boss, feeling that little excited flutter whenever he would text me. I already was crushing, hard, before even meeting him. It made me that much more nervous about seeing him... what if he didn't like me? What if I didn't like him? What if the whole thing was a big disappointment?? There was already more pressure put on the situation than there needed to be, which I suppose is never a good thing.
Finally the date came... First of all, he was honest about his income. Beautiful house in a good part of LA, two silver Mercedes Benz cars, one 2-seater and one SUV ("they match!" He says... geeeeze). He was funny. He was a gentleman. He was affectionate, but in a good way. He took me to a really nice restaurant with fantastic tapas, but I honestly wouldn't have known it, as I was so distracted by the great conversation. This was going so well! Back to his place, we had a hot makeout session. I was excited. He was great! And yes, the thought of a man who could easily take care of me and a family I would like to some day have was very alluring. I was kind of in a daze about this guy, so I didn't right away wonder why he left things, after walking me to my car, with "I'll call you." The daze continued into the next morning, but by the afternoon the shadows set in when he hadn't contacted me. Not a text, not a call. Everyone told me I was too quick to get upset, but I knew. I felt it then. The cloudy daze had lifted, and it was clear.
To be fair, that night he texted me. But something was off. The next day, more texts, and more strangeness to them. He wasn't making plans for a second date. By day 3, I was about 90% certain, and decided to force his card so that I didn't spend all week just wondering what was going on. I asked him what he was doing that weekend. No response. Nothing. It's been a week, today I delete his number from my phone.
Goodbye, Rich Guy...
Post Script: I learned some very important lessons from this date. Number one, it is far more honorable to let someone know, even if it be via email or Facebook message, that you no longer want to see them, than to be weird, aloof and disappear. Number two, I don't have to be intimidated by someone who is well educated and successful. It is possible that I am just good enough to be in a relationship with someone like that. Number three, I am not ready, yet, to meet the guy I will be able to spend the rest of my life with. Some of my wounds are too fresh.
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